Another birthday has come and gone. Getting older is not so bad. At least I'm not as reluctant as I was last year. Living in the country where looking young is so valued absurdly - sometimes that is the only thing appreciated - by so many people, I often forget what it's like to be at my own age. I would rather like to become more mature and intellectual than to waste my time thinking about looking younger. I'm just fine being myself. No?
I realized that I did not get something I usually get - or have gotten at least for the last two years - on my birthday. Nothing material. I'm more surprised than disappointed, for I was pretty sure that I would get it. I was deadwrong. Now I think about it, there had been a sign. I'm not loathed or despised, though, it is merely indifference. I was only filling an empty space, and now the seat is taken. That's all. As hard as it is and though I still have some faith, it's time that I let go.